It's just odd, when too many times, incessantly, there is this "bless" matter, without any considerations of bounded faculty, mathematical sublime, etc...or even Derrida's theology, and yet, many are free to have that go at me, and why? I am at work, and once upon a time there was a demanded respect for someone who did what I did, in terms of studies, but not anymore, though it is getting better. Still, even with design, it seems a lot of need to read into matters, of people having their reasons, and yet, when I modeled this language mathematically, I already made clear such a trajectory would be incomplete. The language isn't developed, of a to be continued type of affair. Much like one can find a need to be so literal, in relation to matters, like mathematical sublime, but I wouldn't find a need for these universals. That isn't a rejection, nor is it a lack of understanding, rather it's about asking the right questions, rather than holding answers to the deemed other, which isn't completely stopping. It's happened twice in the past two weeks, but it falls flat entirely with me. We can question matters, much like we can focus on the interactivity between, we can intertwine the to the good requires the bad, to drop the Talk-Talk and consider matters of design. I will likely model here and there, but I must say, when I modeled Guattari, I think the decoded flows codes the machine, invest-invest organs, desire, revolutionary desire, was the closing of the polemics project, and into what i was working on throughout last year quietly, which was plan A, B, and C, of my tapestry project, with decisions that needed to be made in relation to an audience. Plan A was intended on being light-hearted and fun, like my mamaw's kitchen. She had a chartreuse kitchen that was magical, she fed me buttered bread and Spaghettios with sherbet on the side, had a fabulous shag carpet, and would chain smoke in the recliner while I played with my care-bear mobile. It was a car in the shape of a cloud. I thought of plan A as a tribute to Carol King in some kind of way for obvious reasons. More informal and Woodstock. It didn't work. The remark that got to me, was it was all over the place, when I was clear I can design anything. It's more about the decisions in relation, which then, I moved on to the Unicorn Tapestries trajectory. I like that one too! It holds my Edin ties and I think the group will like it. Regardless still, the aesthetic and approach is my approach. Something that I put forth the effort, made the editing decisions, and moved forward with. It's fun. I even bought 2 business books, on the project, which one is fantastic, in that it focuses not on "making money" but more so on how to sustain a voice among such activities. The other one is "making money" but it has more than that, in relation to different approaches to the whole social media chaos and ways to use feeds and emails. I'm not so sure if I would follow the advice though. Even the whole Pinterest matter, I have been slow to start on that, because I'd like everything to be more focused on a study of textiles, rather than buy my stash. I think of Iris Apfel, the mind that even deflected matters of elevation. Bill Cunningham did the same I think. Herb and Dorothy... Meaning, I have a mentality that isn't aimed at attention, but rather connection in relation to the process. We'll see though. There are a lot of earth angels, who with the kindest of considerations, can have any such mentality thoroughly wrapped up into their nice-nothing hell. Meaning, regardless of the work I put in and the approach, and the consideration, I do seem to have a following that would prefer to belittle my activities, narrate what they are, review, and denounce. Sure, I'd like to consider most people genuinely good, but incessant smiling tells all to me. I think most of us want to be good, but to get there, or to exist as an earth angel, doesn't leave much room for the deemed others to exist as good, which isn't so nice. This is what I mean even among the mentality, of embracing these matters of intertwine-ment, contradiction, and being at ease with non-universalism, which again isn't a rejection of universalism. I think too we all want love, but I tend to defer to Bettie Davis' "All this and Heaven too" of the ending scene (or that look as she smells the flower on the movie cover), of a non-literal moment, among the minds desiring the literal confirmation, of which indicates a bit of sarcasm in the title. When you need to know, you know you don't know, you know you know...mathematical sublime, mobius rather than circle? I think of dichotomies like pure and impure, and yet, to be among the gossip. They seemed to be the 2 mobius strips at opposite chirality not so concerned among literal demands and mirror play. Must have been nice. The "Unhollywood" Hollywood "love" scene. It seems even if one desires or considers these things, it's Hollywood love for all now, a regular golden corral of humanity, coupled with any kind of affirming TV show you could possibly imagine. For me, at least I can focus on my oil painting approach, which is coming together quite nicely, wax art, and acrylic open impression too. I'm at that stage where painting moves in a fluid manner, with quick setups, quick transitions, and the ability to shift quickly into differing approaches...something about the harmonies contextualizing space that color the sky a realizable blue. Something that wouldn't involve Hollywood affirmations. Painting though, in terms of interacting among an audience, seems to be...something I want to remain intimate. Not so, public, even though I am someone who enjoys museums and galleries. I want to have a voice in public settings, involving something that I don't want to be so intimate. Meaning, I paint in a way where I enjoy and connect in silence. Think of this like a very different form of entertainment, that, instead of TV, I spend the vast majority of my time doing something like this, though, I do have a guilty pleasure for Real Housewives...Still, after witnessing a tiara fight, I return back to something that is much better than the backlight screen, my paints, my color work, my editing, my projects that work in relation to both public and intimate forum. Life is good; Mobius, Non-Universalism and all, even if, a group intends on figuring out everything I do to simply mock my very existence of help, in such a literal fashion. To be so outward, among one's existence, I would consider what this all means...it must be hell, with a smile. I mean, to win in this world...and yet, there would be people who even follow what it means to exhibit a trajectory, of one's process vs observe, copy, and imitate. One can do that among those who can do whatever they like. I mean, when there is no standard, maybe that "feels" nice for folks, though considering, no, it doesn't. Something else would be driving that behavior, thoroughly disconnected. And yes, you could say I have my reasons, and yet, what did I do? Reason insofar...contributing to the development of language, considering the emergence, like that of the Summeric, Egyptic, etc...as language develops. Culture is one matter and Civilization another. Matters of civilization are useful to the upcoming generations. Specifically, language would be that matter of civilization, of which my work, right or wrong, in relation to a method, the mere representation of a dynamic form of the language development, in relation to dynamic medium certainly does contribute to the further development of civilization. I did that. I know what I did as I moved away from the notion among interactive paradigm. Our language is incomplete among this Talk-Talk, and yet, even as I Talk-Talk, I sign post, and detour in a way, that among those with enough rigor, they can actually open up away from their "know all" absurdity and connect, which includes following how certain behaviors, if they were on the receiving end, wouldn't be at all acceptable, and yet, some are so "free" in applying the behaviors they wouldn't like to receive themselves to others, all the while, professing we should love our neighbor. Things that make you go hmmm...So there is that aspect as well. It is talk-talk, yes, but there is also a walk-walk, among informatic modeling, textiling, art, academics, music projects...so why pretend among insecurity? Why not, live and let live? What does one achieve when the "achievement" is we figured it all out, to embody the one's process? Did you? Emergence is the same as a copy cat play? In what way did this assertion come into being? And this would be the same activity? Disconnected. Moving beyond the absurdity, I remain connected to the mentality of the Iris Apfels of the world, the Herb and Dorothies, the Bill Cunninghams, where a mirror to any and all is an omission. Much like the ending of Bettie Davis film, among that title. To get it...To actually connect. It just seems, there indeed is a grouping, that needs me to disappear, with all the smiles, with all of the underhanded play, with all of the disengagement they can muster. I can't control them. I have to focus elsewhere, and I have...and it doesn't seem to sit well with them. When I consider matters of disconnect, I suppose the literal assertions in relation to me can help. So there is a need to hold a mirror to me? I'm not the first, nor will I be the last. Why this need? Assuming, there is even an awareness of the behavior, which considering what I have observed, couldn't actually be assumed, but when you know, even when you can't know what you don't know, hey, you know! The Universal, like the circus, has arrived, and you, the top hat among the rings. I'm painting...and developing in relation to something that would differ. Who needs to be good or right, when there is a genuine sense of connection. Granted, there is television's the road to self-realization, much like copy cat plays of observing an emergence, and treating the mimicry as the same endeavor, which doesn't even touch on one even recognizing the fact they wouldn't respect or appreciate someone treating them that way, and yet to a deemed other, totally fine. Why? What, within you, or lack thereof, makes that permissible? Again, there is this disconnect, among literal know all mentality, which wouldn't involve the symbolism of the Mobius or my practice of Non-Universalism, or even my work with the language arrangement that asserts this form of knowing remains without full development, and yet we know all, including knowing all about this deemed other "who knows it all!" How so? It's not going to be about me. This wouldn't be a polemic of the past. Rather, the language remains without a full development, so the basis of claim in that sense that inspires a need to act upon, to assert, to gossip about...I remain curious. How did this come about? Considering what has changed today, why this comfort, in pretending the current form of language achieves some form of universalism? And yet, there is such a need still to bless me, among personalities, who find it easy within them to be so loving in that way that isn't so loving. How did this, ever, come to be?
